On November 27th, 2022, the 8,000th article was added to the SuccuWiki!
Punished by my Succubus (eBook): Difference between revisions
mNo edit summary |
mNo edit summary |
||
| Line 57: | Line 57: | ||
== Book Review == | == Book Review == | ||
'' | ''The following review was originally published by Tera on her Blog, A Succubi's Tale on [http://www.succubus.net/blog/2016/01/15/a-review-of-punished-by-my-succubus-by-harper-lewis/ January 15, 2016]'' | ||
Steven finds himself at the mercy of Cassandra, a Succubus who has plans for him. A spell used, her dominance set, Cassandra takes Steven and brings Marilyn to life. For Marilyn, that life is to serve her Mistress as best she can evermore. | |||
You might note that I called the main character, after their transformation Marilyn, but the book summary calls her Maryland. This is just one of the many issues I had in this work. There are many instances where both names are used and the question is, of course, which one is correct? | |||
Past that problem, the writing is clunky, uneven, has problems with tense and tone. There are moments where it is actually very hard to read the story because the words on the page do not connect together well. For example, Marilyn is told to kiss Cassandra’s hand…. and she kisses Cassandra’s lips. The disconnection at times in the story just takes away the heat from the scenes, the story idea, and most of all, leaves behind a story that just hasn’t anything within it. | |||
Cassandra is, as a whole, a well over the top Domme, almost stereotypically so. As well, in many ways, she is rather stereotypical as a Succubus as well. The entire purpose of her being seems to be as dominant as possible over those in her thrall and to bend their wills to her own. There are some scenes that flash by, seeming to have no purpose other than to try to be erotic, and then the story moves onto her cackling and ranting over what she has done, or could do. | |||
In that, there’s little that held me to the story, even as I hoped for something to come out of what transpired. The work feels like it was written as quickly as possible, then the author’s catalog of stories was attached to the end, and then it was published. I somehow doubt there was even a single editing pass made. | |||
Here’s the thing however. There is a story here, it is hinted at, but it never really gets out from underneath the over the top BDSM scenes and that left me wanting sadly. The author would be well served to take another try at this work, for in as it is now, it is simply underwhelming. | |||
I’ll give this work one pitchfork out of five. | |||
This work needs a severe edit at the least, more story at the better, and, to make it something worth reading the work should be at least more than a handful of pages in what passes for a catalog of the author’s works. | |||
== External Links == | == External Links == | ||
*[http://www.amazon.com/Punished-Succubus-Gender-Sensual-Bondage-ebook/dp/B00UKHNPBY/ This work in Kindle Format at Amazon.com] | *[http://www.amazon.com/Punished-Succubus-Gender-Sensual-Bondage-ebook/dp/B00UKHNPBY/ This work in Kindle Format at Amazon.com] | ||
Latest revision as of 10:10, 17 January 2016
| Punished by my Succubus | |
|---|---|
 Punished by my Succubus eBook Cover, written by Harper Lewis | |
| Author(s) | Harper Lewis |
| Publisher | Harper Lewis |
| Publication date | March 10, 2015 |
| Media type | eBook |
| Length | 78 Pages |
| ASIN | B00UKHNPBY |
For other uses of the word Succubus, see Succubus (disambiguation).
Punished by my Succubus is an eBook written by Harper Lewis. In this work the character Cassandra is a Succubus.
Overview
- Title: Punished by my Succubus
- Author: Harper Lewis
- Published By: Harper Lewis
- Length: 78 Pages
- Format: eBook
- ASIN: B00UKHNPBY
- Publishing Date: March 10, 2015
Plot Summary
Roped, naked and now a woman isn’t something Steven thought could happen to him when he woke up and went to the corner market.
When stolen by a naughty succubus Steven becomes Maryland, a beautiful, blonde buxom woman. Will Maryland be able to handle the painful pleasures his new Mistress and her servant Wyatt dish out?
Book Review
The following review was originally published by Tera on her Blog, A Succubi's Tale on January 15, 2016
Steven finds himself at the mercy of Cassandra, a Succubus who has plans for him. A spell used, her dominance set, Cassandra takes Steven and brings Marilyn to life. For Marilyn, that life is to serve her Mistress as best she can evermore.
You might note that I called the main character, after their transformation Marilyn, but the book summary calls her Maryland. This is just one of the many issues I had in this work. There are many instances where both names are used and the question is, of course, which one is correct?
Past that problem, the writing is clunky, uneven, has problems with tense and tone. There are moments where it is actually very hard to read the story because the words on the page do not connect together well. For example, Marilyn is told to kiss Cassandra’s hand…. and she kisses Cassandra’s lips. The disconnection at times in the story just takes away the heat from the scenes, the story idea, and most of all, leaves behind a story that just hasn’t anything within it.
Cassandra is, as a whole, a well over the top Domme, almost stereotypically so. As well, in many ways, she is rather stereotypical as a Succubus as well. The entire purpose of her being seems to be as dominant as possible over those in her thrall and to bend their wills to her own. There are some scenes that flash by, seeming to have no purpose other than to try to be erotic, and then the story moves onto her cackling and ranting over what she has done, or could do.
In that, there’s little that held me to the story, even as I hoped for something to come out of what transpired. The work feels like it was written as quickly as possible, then the author’s catalog of stories was attached to the end, and then it was published. I somehow doubt there was even a single editing pass made.
Here’s the thing however. There is a story here, it is hinted at, but it never really gets out from underneath the over the top BDSM scenes and that left me wanting sadly. The author would be well served to take another try at this work, for in as it is now, it is simply underwhelming. I’ll give this work one pitchfork out of five.
This work needs a severe edit at the least, more story at the better, and, to make it something worth reading the work should be at least more than a handful of pages in what passes for a catalog of the author’s works.